We moved here two years ago and we know nobody in this world
Looking for people to know, before anything else at all
We moved here two years ago and left behind a group of people who had known this about us for years. Here we have colleagues, a landlord and a very good doctor, and nobody at all who knows anything.
Thirty four and thirty seven, downtown, nine years in this before we arrived. What we underestimated was how much of what we had was simply time. At home nobody had to take us on trust because they had been watching us for a decade. Here we are two strangers with an unverifiable history, which is fair enough and is lonelier than we expected.
So this post is about people rather than anything else. Couples, singles, anybody. We would like to be invited to things and eventually to do some inviting ourselves. We cook far too much and we turn up when we say we will.
If something else came out of that in a year, we are not closed to it. It is not why we are writing.
Not looking to be shown the ropes, since we have nine years of our own. Not looking for anyone who wants to be our introduction to the city in a way that leaves us relying on them. Not looking for anything that starts with somebody explaining what a couple our age ought to want.
Before the first drink Replying goes through the connected platform, so nothing about you is shared until you decide to share it. Take contact slowly and keep identifying details back until trust is earned. Meet somewhere public the first time, with your own way home from it, and if you are a couple then go together. Tell someone outside it where you are going. Never send money to someone you have not met. And if a post or a reply reads wrong, flag it rather than talking yourself out of the feeling.
Before you answer a post like this
Nobody here is asking for a date, so none of this is about arranging one.
- What it is actually like, against what you imagined
- How to tell your partner you want this
- When there is no scene where you live