The person who must never know sleeps on the other side of a wall
Looking for a man with his own place, and no curiosity about why that is fixed
She moved in three years ago and she is not going anywhere, and I would not want her to. She is eighty one, she is excellent company, she cooks better than either of us, and she would be genuinely devastated by all of this in a way that would never blow over. So the person who must never know is fifteen steps down the hall.
Practically that means we cannot host, ever, and that an evening out has to be an ordinary sort of evening out. Not secretive. Simply unremarkable enough that no story attaches to it. Dinner with a friend from work. Something on a Thursday. She does not interrogate anybody, but she notices everything, and a house has a rhythm that breaks audibly.
Forty three, the western suburbs, four years open. Two arrangements in that time, one of about eighteen months. My husband is entirely settled about it and takes a certain pleasure in being the one keeping the household running while I am out, which is a joke that has now lasted four years.
What I need is a man with his own place and nobody else in it, which I gather is the most requested thing on any board of this kind, and I have no better card to play than saying it plainly.
What I offer against that is reliability. I plan weeks ahead, I do not cancel, and I have never once arrived with a complication. My constraint is fixed, and it has made me extremely organised about everything else.
Before the first drink Replying goes through the connected platform, so nothing about you is shared until you decide to share it. Take contact slowly and keep identifying details back until trust is earned. Meet somewhere public the first time, with your own way home from it, and if you are a couple then go together. Tell someone outside it where you are going. Never send money to someone you have not met. And if a post or a reply reads wrong, flag it rather than talking yourself out of the feeling.
Before you answer a post like this
She is searching with a partner who agreed to it, so read the label carefully before you read anything else.
- Cuckold, hotwife, stag and vixen: the vocabulary map
- She comes with a partner. Vet both of them
- The first meeting: a drink, all three of you