My face is part of how I earn a living. No photographs
Looking for somebody who can be interested without seeing me first
There are no photographs of me connected to any of this and there never will be. My face is part of how I earn a living, which in this city is less unusual than it sounds, and an image somewhere I cannot control would be a genuine professional problem rather than an embarrassment.
I know exactly what that costs me here. Roughly two thirds of conversations end when I explain it, usually politely, occasionally not. I have made my peace with the arithmetic.
What I will do is a video call once we have talked properly, and I will meet in daylight somewhere well away from where I live. That is more information about me than a photograph would be, and everybody who has been through it agrees afterwards.
Thirty nine, the east side, married nine years, five of them like this. My husband knows all of it and is not present at anything past a first meeting.
We can host, and honestly that is the main reason this works at all. Not looking for anyone who accepts it and then raises it again in week five. Not looking for anyone who wants to guess what I do, which happens and which I find tedious. Not looking for anyone who needs a face before he will write a paragraph.
Before the first drink Replying goes through the connected platform, so nothing about you is shared until you decide to share it. Take contact slowly and keep identifying details back until trust is earned. Meet somewhere public the first time, with your own way home from it, and if you are a couple then go together. Tell someone outside it where you are going. Never send money to someone you have not met. And if a post or a reply reads wrong, flag it rather than talking yourself out of the feeling.
Before you answer a post like this
She is searching with a partner who agreed to it, so read the label carefully before you read anything else.
- Cuckold, hotwife, stag and vixen: the vocabulary map
- She comes with a partner. Vet both of them
- The first meeting: a drink, all three of you