I arrived in March, I know three people, and I want a coffee and nothing else
Looking for conversation and company, explicitly with nothing behind it
I got here in March, at the end of the warm part of the year, and I have watched the light go at five o'clock in a city where I know exactly three people, two of them through work. That is the whole situation. I am not in any difficulty. I am new, it is getting cold, and the evenings are long in the wrong way.
I am a single man posting in the friendship section of a board like this, which I am aware reads as a manoeuvre. I have thought about how to prove otherwise and there is no way to do it, so I will simply be direct. I am not asking to meet anybody's wife. I am not asking to be introduced to anything. I am not building towards anything, and if a conversation with me starts drifting that way I will be the one who steers it back.
Thirty one. I did have a life around all this in the city I came from: six years of it, two arrangements that ended for ordinary reasons, and friends who knew. That is what I am actually missing. Not an arrangement. The people.
What I would like is somebody to have a coffee with who needs no background filled in. Couples, women, other single men, anybody. I cook, I am better in a group than one to one, and I turn up when I say I will.
There is no clever ending to this post. It is a request for a coffee.
Before the first drink Replying goes through the connected platform, so nothing about you is shared until you decide to share it. Take contact slowly and keep identifying details back until trust is earned. Meet somewhere public the first time, with your own way home from it, and if you are a couple then go together. Tell someone outside it where you are going. Never send money to someone you have not met. And if a post or a reply reads wrong, flag it rather than talking yourself out of the feeling.
Before you answer a post like this
Nobody here is asking for a date, so none of this is about arranging one.
- What it is actually like, against what you imagined
- How to tell your partner you want this
- When there is no scene where you live