We got ninety replies to our first post and answered four of them badly
Looking for one single man who has read past the first line
The first time we posted we had ninety odd replies inside two days, and we were so flattered by the volume that we forgot to read any of them properly. Three drinks came out of it. All three were with men who had written two lines, and all three turned out to be exactly what two lines suggested.
So this is the second attempt, written differently. We are thirty eight and forty one, married nine years, Manhattan, open for about a year. He knows everything and wants to. She dates. Nothing happens that both of us have not agreed to first, and either of us can stop it without giving a reason.
What we want now is one person we see repeatedly. First meetings are a lot of work and we would rather put that work into somebody we already like than start again every six weeks.
The filter, and we mean it: tell us something you thought about this post. Not what you would do. What you thought. Half a paragraph is enough. We are not setting a test, we simply cannot tell forty enthusiastic strangers apart otherwise, and the last round proved we cannot do it on instinct.
Not looking for anyone who writes to her alone. He reads everything and that is not a formality, it is the arrangement. Not looking for anyone who describes an evening before he has asked a single question. Not looking for anyone in a hurry, because we are slow, and slow is the only part of this we have got right so far.
Before the first drink Replying goes through the connected platform, so nothing about you is shared until you decide to share it. Take contact slowly and keep identifying details back until trust is earned. Meet somewhere public the first time, with your own way home from it, and if you are a couple then go together. Tell someone outside it where you are going. Never send money to someone you have not met. And if a post or a reply reads wrong, flag it rather than talking yourself out of the feeling.
Before you answer a post like this
Two people wrote this together, and both of them have to say yes to you. These are the three written for the man on the other end of it.
- What makes a single man read as safe
- Vetting a couple: the screening men skip
- The first meeting: a drink, all three of you