Single man
North east, three years in, friendship first every time
Looking for a couple who want to know me before anything else happens
Almost everyone I have met in three years I met at a social or a munch, and I think that is why it has gone well. You get to know somebody sideways, over a table, with no pressure on the evening.
So my honest preference is a friendship first. Dinner, a walk, whatever, with both of you, several times before anything else is on the table. Some couples find that too slow and that is a fair reason to pass.
I am forty one, sociable, terrible at texting and better in person. I will always talk to both of you and I will notice if one of you goes quiet.
What I am not: available at short notice, interested in being anyone’s secret, or willing to skip the conversation about health and limits. I ask early and I answer plainly.
If you are near a scene, I would genuinely rather meet at an event first than message for weeks. Standing in the same room for an hour tells us both more than either of us can write down.
Before the first drink Replying goes through the connected platform, so nothing about you is shared until you decide to share it. Take contact slowly and keep identifying details back until trust is earned. Meet somewhere public the first time, with your own way home from it, and if you are a couple then go together. Tell someone outside it where you are going. Never send money to someone you have not met. And if a post or a reply reads wrong, flag it rather than talking yourself out of the feeling.
Also on the board
Newly open, pacific north west, first time writing one of these
A woman searching for the first time with her husband knowing and agreeing, nervous about posting but clear that he is part of this, not an inconvenience.