Introductions discussion

Hi there,

To begin with, I’ve been married for two years and have two kids (the eldest is my wife’s from a previous relationship). Before we tied the knot, I owned a Pink CB3k which I wore intermittently as part of a fantasy. I had quite a few other items related to feminization back then.

Unfortunately, everything moved quickly during our dating phase. The next thing I knew, I’d tossed all my fantasies and “toys” into the bin, and we were heading off to Vegas for the wedding. I chose not to tell her about this hidden side of mine, thinking that having a wife would help curb my urges and allow me to move on.

Unfortunately, they didn’t subside; in fact, lately, they’ve been getting worse!

I work in construction, so I’m constantly relocated wherever the job takes me. My wife and her son used to travel with me, but after our baby arrived and we noticed our older son moving schools frequently, we decided it was best for her to settle down. With the current state of the economy, I continue traveling and only get to see her once a month and during holidays.

Over the last few months while doing this, I find myself constantly browsing the web for anything that excites me so I can jerk off. The need to relieve myself has become so intense it’s hard to focus at work, often leading me on drives just to jerk off and calm down. I was already doing this when my wife lived with us too. It causes frustration for both of us because sometimes I can’t perform at night. Occasionally, I use the excuse that I’m too tired or just not in the mood.

Last weekend, while I was home, I went six times over four days but only managed to cum twice because I had cleaned myself out during my 12-hour drive back. My wife gets relief when she can get it, but she feels disappointed and guilty when I’m unable to produce (which makes me feel the same way). A couple of months ago, I couldn’t take it anymore and bought a CB6k, starting up its use recreationally again. I also picked up some “manties”.

This weekend, I was trying to see how long I could last locked in when curiosity struck. I went on another buying binge, purchasing a Birdlocked and several pairs of panties this time, along with some PJs (some for my wife too). I spent the entire weekend reading posts and stories before finally deciding to post.

Sorry for being so wordy, but it all felt important to me, and it’s a relief to get it out. I want to include my wife in my chastity journey because I feel that is the only way to curb my need to jerk off while fulfilling her sexual needs when I am home. I want to sweep her off her feet and please her as well as be able to perform when expected.

Most importantly, I want to be open with her about this issue; I’m just not sure how. I know I should have told her initially before we started a family, but I was too embarrassed and ashamed… still am. I don’t want her to think of me as a freak or less of a man, nor do I want her son to find out and think the same thing—he looks up to me so much!

How should I tell her? Will telling her and leaving for work just days later ruin our marriage? These are questions I continue to ponder while trying to figure out how, if, and when.

Thanks for reading this and offering any suggestions you might have…

With Respect, beefycorndog