Gurscaged Just starting out here; let's watch how things develop

Hi there, I’ve just begun this journey after spotting it on Twitter and thinking, ‘That sounds like a solid idea.’ I’m 51 years old and have been married for 23. My wife and I haven’t had sex very often since our son was born (he’s now 19). I’ve slipped up a couple of times before, visiting ladies to ease the tension. I usually watch quite a bit of porn, and ever since getting the Twitter app recently, my viewing has increased even more. That escalation is what led me here. I’ve come to realize that I’m watching too much content and touching myself too frequently. Early this year, my wife was diagnosed with advanced cancer, which has been quite a heavy burden on our household as you can imagine. She’s now on ongoing treatment. Initially, she hoped that once the therapy started working and extending her life, she would feel more like herself again. She remains grateful for it all, but in truth, things haven’t changed exactly how I’d hoped they might. I carry some guilt because I desire more intimacy, yet I don’t want to be unfaithful again. To help manage this, I purchased my first chastity device—a metal model from a shop here in Thetford. Unfortunately, I acted impulsively after seeing one online and chose a version with a 40mm hinged ring. This turned out to be an error; the ring was too tight and chafed the skin, leaving me with a sore spot at the top:( Recognizing my mistake, I decided to buy another cage but took time to research properly this time, settling on the cb6000. Right now, I’m using the largest ring size available for it, which feels comfortable. There’s just enough room to slip a finger underneath, and the fit is good overall. Getting it on does require some effort—I’ve seen people use plastic bags as lubrication aids, which seems effective. I plan to wear this device during daytime hours only because I haven’t yet worked up the courage to talk things over with my wife. She can be a bit traditional or closed-minded, and given her health situation, I’m not certain she would fully understand—or necessarily want to—incur the adjustment. She typically sees me naked only when we go to bed at night, so keeping the device concealed is manageable for now while I build up confidence to discuss it. This also gives me time to get accustomed to wearing it and confirm it suits my lifestyle. My long-term goal is that once her time comes, I will wear this permanently and find someone reliable to hold the key. I have no plans to seek out a new partner; in fact, I don’t particularly want one right now. I was surprised by how much arousal it generates for me. Walking through shops or along streets while wearing it creates a constant awareness that no one else knows about this secret constraint. It has also curbed my habit of self-pleasure because I leave the key out of easy reach, though I still occasionally manage a quick session in the morning shower. Looking ahead, I’ll need to discover methods for pleasing myself while restrained, which might open up other possibilities—perhaps using dildos or similar aids. Let’s see how things unfold.