Have You Ever Crunched the Numbers?

We spent most of our lives as constant wankers. I found out about orgasms 44 years back, usually hitting them twice daily. Let’s call the average a conservative 1.5 per day, though it might really be closer to 1.75. So that works out to 44 times 1.5 times 365, plus 11 for leap years… which puts us over 24 thousand orgasms total. If we count about a teaspoon of fluid each time, and there are roughly 768 teaspoons in a gallon, that adds up to more than 31 gallons.

I’ve got plenty of free time now, yet I only managed two orgasms these past couple of weeks. You can probably guess what I’m thinking. Being locked up seems like the right move for me.