A Ruined Orgasm and Lost Lust

Hi there,

I’d like to share a quick background first of all. My wife and I are relatively new to MC, though we’ve been involved in T&D for quite a while now. We began our MC journey a few months back, with my longest continuous lock so far being around 12 days. Both of us are really enjoying it at this point, and Mrs is finding she likes the dynamic too.

I haven’t had much experience with ruined orgasms up until now, but the couple I’ve tried have been decent enough. What’s surprising me is that I haven’t yet felt the typical mood swing that usually hits me after a regular release—until yesterday came along. Below is an excerpt from my diary detailing what happened.

“Sunday 14 Oct. Day 12 A5+, F3 It’s been tricky distinguishing between arousal and frustration, but I feel like I’m more aroused than frustrated right now. Naturally, when denial sets in, there’s some frustration, though it fades pretty fast. Also, my sensitivity is high; a simple look, smile, or light touch from Mrs sends electricity through me instantly!

Mrs edged me at bedtime and I got close several times before she announced it was time for sleep. I attempted to bargain for an orgasm, but she just hushed me up and told me to go to bed. So I relaxed, letting the sexual tension ebb away. Then she came back at me, starting over again. Knowing an orgasm was likely on its way this time.

She edged me once more; I got very close twice and had to stop myself both times. The second one stopped because I felt like Mrs hadn’t intended for me to cum that quickly, plus I didn’t want the moment to end just yet. It seemed to qualify as a ruined release since I lacked that peak feeling of an orgasmic high.

However, when she tried initiating again afterward, my drive dropped significantly—I went soft on her twice, which is rare for me! At this stage, serious regret set in regarding stopping that earlier climax!

Why did it happen? Was the ruin incomplete? It certainly felt properly ruined. Perhaps knowing an orgasm was imminent played a part? I think I would have preferred accepting the denied release willingly despite my confusion.

I suspect anxiety crept in after halting the flow; I even had to pinch below the head because clamping down alone wasn’t enough against the pulsing sensation. Previously, when experiencing ruined orgasms during sex, I never attempted resuming intercourse immediately afterwards. Could this be a shorter refractory period specifically following a ruined O?

I suspect overthinking was involved:) …and subsequently lost my momentum entirely! At least Mrs claims that yes, thinking too much is often my undoing!”

Post-event, I felt terrible about losing my erection; it desperately wanted to return but just wouldn’t come. Does anyone have insights or similar experiences regarding this phenomenon?