thornhill_and_j
Two months of arranging
- Posting sinceSept 2026
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- Posts asHusband
- Mostly inFeelings
We had been working towards this since August. Two months of messages, two false starts on dates, a lot of careful conversation between the two of us about what we did and did not want.
Thursday evening he messaged to say he could not make Saturday. Something genuine and unavoidable, nothing dramatic, apologised properly and asked about rescheduling.
My wife was disappointed. I read the message, said the right things out loud, and felt an enormous physical wave of relief. Actual relief, in the shoulders. Like getting a snow day.
I have not told her that. I said something sympathetic and we ordered a takeaway and had a nice evening, and I have been chewing on it ever since.
The question I cannot answer is what that means. Because I want this. I have wanted it for years, I raised it, I have thought about very little else since August. And then the moment it was cancelled some part of me put down a weight I had not known I was carrying.
Does that mean I do not actually want it and have been talking myself into something? Or is being relieved about a specific Saturday not the same as being relieved about the whole thing?
Has anybody else had this and worked out which one it was?