Journals and blogs discussion

I’ve shared a few entries since introducing myself, so I thought it was time to launch my journal. My journey began last autumn, and I’ll aim to update without making this too long-winded. My spouse (who is also the Keyholder) and I are in our fifties and lead what you’d call a pretty standard life. We’re open-minded and ready to experiment sexually. Over the past year, we’ve both noticed that our sex life has been slipping. She worried it might be her issue, but I knew the problem was mine. Because of my frequent work travel, I masturbate excessively when away from home—so much so that sometimes I struggle to perform with her once I’m back. This concerned us both, yet I failed to speak honestly about it online, while surfing for solutions, I stumbled upon cross-dressing and decided this might help resolve my issue and add some excitement to our relationship. Unfortunately, I handled introducing the concept poorly. First off, I bought a CB 6000 cage online without telling her. She found out when the package arrived, so I was caught red-handed and had to confess everything about my excessive masturbation habits. She was curious, and we tried it on together several times, though it took weeks to find the right ring and spacer fit for me. Then the holidays hit, pausing things somewhat. While browsing online later, I discovered “Chastity, A Keyholder’s Guide” and ordered that too without consulting her. We already owned some toys and a vibrator/massager which we use occasionally. The pattern seemed to be: every time I made a surprise purchase for myself, it annoyed her more than the item itself—it was the secrecy that bothered her. However, she read the book and other articles I provided. When we finally discussed it properly, she agreed to act as my Keyholder but on her own terms and schedule. She remains uneasy about being seen in public with me wearing the cage, worrying what friends or family might think. What should have been done correctly? In hindsight, I believe I should have included her from the start regarding the idea of chastity, consulted her on buying the device, and researched online together to understand this lifestyle better. Why do men always complicate things? Ultimately, she has agreed to be my Keyholder and is interested in exploring this path despite all my mistakes. This shows what a wonderful woman she is and how much she cares for me. I’m truly fortunate. I’ll wrap up here before putting everyone to sleep. Look forward to posting about my first locked period soon.