Chastity and orgasm denial discussion

My wife doesn’t really get involved in my chastity journey much. Mostly, I’m locking myself up, and tonight feels like one of those ‘what on earth am I doing?’ evenings. It didn’t help that a caning was supposed to happen as part of the weight loss plan she promised to support. I held back from mentioning it because I wanted to see if she’d remember her promise, but she forgot. I took myself out of the lock before showering (mostly so I could shave and clean up better), yet she didn’t even note that I was free. So for everyone else self-locking: how do you keep your motivation going? I’m feeling like giving up tonight, but I still like being denied; even when it’s denial on my own terms. At this pace, I might just sign up for an Emlalock account.