When conflicting desires meet

My girlfriend has been wonderful about the whole chastity setup for the past five months. Her hesitation vanished within a week or two, and now she loves locking me up for periods of 2 to 4 weeks at a time. We’ve really enjoyed the experience.

This all happened after we tried pegging about a year ago; she didn’t care much for those attempts back then.

She knows I have some unique sexual tastes—foot fetish (I like them with odor, please!), humiliation, watching gay or tranny porn occasionally—and that I enjoy being pegged. She accepts these quirks even if she doesn’t indulge in all of them fully.

When we first started chastity, she expressed a worry about what new kink I might come up with next because I was really pushing the benefits of the lifestyle when I discovered it.

I actually found out about chastity while watching cuckolding porn. Before that video, I had no clue. It led me to read many stories and eventually want to experiment with chastity alongside my girlfriend.

As many of you know, there are numerous chastity stories involving cuckolding.

I started loving those tales and began reading cuckolding blogs and forums. The content kept giving me strong erections throughout the day. So much about this lifestyle resonated with me. Honestly, for the last few months, I’ve spent a lot of my free time reading these things, getting turned on as if it were all happening to me and my girlfriend.

Since we started chastity, my GF has enjoyed becoming more dominant in bed. However, deep down she prefers to be dominated during sex (not in an extreme kink way), which feels a bit unnatural to me, especially when my stamina is depleted after weeks of being locked up. So the idea of cuckolding began taking root.

My girlfriend was kind enough to indulge some fantasy cuckolding play during our sessions. I took this as a sign she was warming up and started encouraging it more.

I brought it up several times, and after we talked things over, we reached an agreement: while the perceived benefits might appeal to me, for her, the downsides outweigh them, so she likely will never try it seriously. She also decided it’s best if we stop bringing up cuckolding play during sex, and I agreed to quit reading blogs and forums on the topic (which I’ve mostly managed, aside from one slip-up).

I’m not sure how to handle this yet. I love her dearly and don’t want to lose her over a fetish, but even after our talks, my obsession continues, and she can see it.

When we were discussing it and she hinted at possibly calling up some old boyfriends, I have to admit it instantly gave me an erection.

After that first conversation, I thought she might change her mind eventually, but I tried convincing myself otherwise because that was what she said…

Now, after our final discussion, I know deep down she never will. Yet my brain keeps trying to persuade me she might one day, even though I truly believe she won’t. (Don’t know if you can make any sense out of that paragraph) Why is this so hard for me to let go? I’m sorry if this sounds ridiculous to all the guys here whose partners aren’t fully into the whole chastity play; my heart goes out to you.